Sun, sand, surf and summer romance! As you head home from college, you may be in the market for a summer fling. You begin to wonder why the girl down the street hasn’t caught your eye before–or you notice that the guy at the community pool has definitely been hitting the gym. (Did he always live in your neighborhood?) Summer flings, although fun, can be difficult when the end of summer rolls around. It is possible, though, to have a fun, successful summer fling. Just follow these five steps and not only will you enjoy your romance, you’ll be heading back to school without any attachments!
5 steps to successfully end your summer fling
The best way to begin (and end) your summer romance is with honesty. Be upfront and truthful at the beginning; and as you enter your summer fling, make sure both parties equally understand that this relationship is just that. This way, at the end of summer, you won’t have to pull a Chandler Bing and fly to Yemen.
Unfortunately, even people with the best intentions end up needing an exit strategy. If this is the case, the following five steps will help you make a break without causing too many hurt feelings.
- Spend less time together
As the end of summer draws near, begin putting distance between you and your summer beau. Not only will this help both of you make a clean break, it will definitely give your fling hints that the relationship will be over soon.
- Don’t make future plans
Even if s/he just wants to road trip over to your college for a “friendly” visit, making future plans gives the idea that there is, in fact, a future. If s/he asks, simply say you don’t know what the upcoming year has in store, and you can’t commit to anything that far in advance.
- Call Me, Maybe (not!)
Regardless if he lives across campus or across the country, trading information gives the impression that you will see each other again. Better to leave a chance meeting to serendipity.
- Know when the time is right to end it
You don’t want to end your romance too soon and risk running into him or her at the next five summer bashes. However, you don’t want to wait until he is packing up to head back to school. Try to find just the right time (and place) for the breakup to go smoothly. Have a movie night a week before you move into the dorm and spend the time talking about how much fun the summer has been but how focused you must be during your next year of school.
- Be honest
Don’t lie about why the relationship is ending, this will only come back to bite you. Instead, take some advice from Courtenay Patterson’s article “DOs and DON’Ts for Having a Summer Fling,” posted to SheNOW on July 16, 2012. Patterson explains, “Figure out a good reason/excuse to break up, whether it’s the end of a vacation, a surprise trip to study abroad, or an unexpected business trip. Keep it clean and simple.” And honest!
Ready for more
Although you may not have planned to continue the relationship after Labor Day, feelings can develop. How do you know if your summer fling could turn into something more? For a breakdown of signs, check out the Her Campus article “Summer Lovin’ or More? How to Know If You Should Go From a Summer Fling to the Real Thing,” posted by Allie Duncan on August 03, 2102.
According to Duncan, “Every once in awhile, you meet someone, and you ‘just know’ that in some way, it is meant to be. If this sounds like what you have with your summer guy, then it’s possible you should try to turn your fling into a more permanent relationship.” If you find yourself in this situation, be honest and be willing to accept the fact that your summer guy or gal may not feel the same way. You both agreed this would just be for the season, after all.
Do you have an outlandish break up story? Want to share some of your most outrageous break up excuses? Share them in the comments below!